101 Advice on Strap-ons

Bodyjoys’ beginner’s guide to strap-ons

Have you ever wondered what strap-on sex toys are, or why dildos are worn with harnesses? Strap-ons were designed for partnered play where you want to switch roles or change the dynamics of your bedroom routine. Strap-on sex toys can be enjoyed by couples of any sexual orientation.

What is strap-on play?

Strap-on play is a sexual activity in which one partner, wearing a strap-on dildo (or vibrator), penetrates the other, either vaginally or anally. The lesbian community has been enjoying strap-on sex for as long as strap-ons have been around. And there are obviously many other penetration (or double penetration!) scenarios that can be played out between different sexes and orientations. Once you get into strap-on play, the only limit is your imagination.

…and what is pegging play?

Pegging is a sex act in which one (usually female) partner performs anal sex on their (usually male) partner using a strap-on dildo. Pegging is not yet a staple in the mainstream sexual repertoire, but we have noticed that this sexual practice is becoming increasingly popular with straight couples — an intriguing option, indeed!

One of the incomprehensible misconceptions about pegging is that only gay men enjoy anal penetration. This is simply nonsense – straight men can and do enjoy the realm of bottoming play too, it simply feels too good to miss out on!

What are the pleasures and benefits of strap-on sex and pegging?

Strap-on sex toys are made for enjoying with your partner. Couples strap them on for numerous reasons:

  • To switch roles and change the dynamics of sexual intercourse
  • To discover and experience new sensations outside the usual bedroom routine
  • To enjoy pleasure from anal stimulation (for the receiver) and from stimulation at the base of the dildo (for the wearer) that presses with every thrust against the clitoris and vulva
  • Because you only live once – why not?
  • Simultaneous vaginal and anal penetration, which some women love

Strap-on dildos are also wonderful sex aids in circumstances where one partner has erectile dysfunction. Despite this issue, penetration can be achieved by using a hollow strap-on, or by wearing a strap-on above the penis. Couples that were initially reluctant to experiment with strap-ons discovered that, once they tried, it allowed them to eventually find their way back to a satisfying sex life.

Which strap-on gear is right for me?

To ensure that you don’t get distracted whilst in action, the strap-on needs to feel comfortable, fit properly, and keep the dildo firmly in place. It’s all about hands-free play with this one, so the dildo must hold up against your body, feel fit and secure, and not wobble. This all comes down to choosing the right harness.

Harnesses typically come in styles such as jockstraps, thongs, and underwear similar to boxers, and in a variety of fabrics and materials. Make sure you choose a style and material you know you will feel comfortable wearing.

When choosing the right dildo for your strap-on, start small and safe...and be sure to consult with the receiver to see what they’re into. You can always go bigger! But the first experience should be as pleasant as possible, especially if you’re intending to try the backdoor.

Consider which strap-on style best fits your gender expression. Some are keen to gender their strap-on play with a realistic dildo, and others want their dildo look as neutral or as colourful as possible. With regard to the different types of strap-on dildos (or dildo vibrators) you can choose from, see our dildo guides for comprehensive advice.

How to combine a strap-on dildo with a harness

Navigating the many different options between dildos and harnesses can be bamboozling. Purchasing a strap-on typically involves buy two things: a dildo, and a harness. If you are new to strap-ons then the best and easiest option is a strap-on set.

The benefits of choosing a dildo and a harness separately is that you get exactly what you desire for your session in terms of style, texture, colour, and material. The wearer can pick their favourite harness, and the receiver can decide on the size and texture of the dildo – fair play!

The main thing to check is that the O-ring on your harness is compatible with the dildo’s diameter. This is the ring through which you tuck the dildo – this needs to be compatible with whatever size dildo you’re going to use. Some harnesses come with O-rings in different sizes, others have elastic rings that can stretch to accommodate different girths.

How to use a strap-on properly

  • Get comfortable with your gear – try it on before you play
  • Be ready with lots of lube
  • Always get full consent
  • Take it slow

You may want to prepare yourself by wearing the strap-on for some time before you get started. Get used to how the harness feels on your body, adjust it so that it’s as comfortable as possible, and then bring in the dildo. Get comfortable – get ready!

Have lube handy – use plenty of lube in your dildo play. For anal penetration, remember to use special anal lube, which is longer-lasting and thicker than regular lube. With lubrication in general, the rule of thumb is: use plenty, and when you think you have enough, double it.

Whatever you do in partnered play, do it with your partner’s consent. Take it slow, talk to each other and make sure you’re both having the most enjoyable experience possible. Communication is essential and as you experiment and explore the delights of strap-on sex you will soon find out what works best for you.

Oh, and in regard to popular strap-on positions – doggy style is a permanent favourite. Try both lying on your sides in a spooning position, or let the receiver go on top for maximum control.

Read on to find out about the most popular strap-on devices, and get best informed on how to choose your strap-on gear. If the information seems overwhelming, head straight to our recommendations for each category.

The most popular types of strap-ons – overview

Most popular strap-on gear – Strap-on Dildos

Dildos designed for strap-on play come with a flared base, which allows them to fit into a harness. You will love the amazing variety of dildos available – there is truly something for everyone, from very realistic to neutral, available in all shapes and sizes imaginable. Make sure the receiving partner is comfortable with your choice.

Key features and benefits of strap-on dildos:

  • The ideal sex toy for serious fun
  • Switch roles, change the power dynamics, and enjoy pleasure from anal and vaginal stimulation
  • For many vulva-owners, pegging is a major turn-on!
  • Receiving partners can discover the enormous and sometimes unexpected joy of anal stimulation
  • Plenty of choices to suit different gender expressions
  • Curved dildos are particularly handy for reaching your partner’s G-spot or prostate

Browse our full range of exciting strap-on dildos and get the fun started!

If you want our advice, we recommend the purple Strap On Me Mono Density Metallic Shine Dildo in medium size(see picture).

Most popular strap-on gear – Strap-on Vibrators

Strap-on vibrators are the same as normal strap-on dildos, but with the added bonus of vibration. These sensations dispense extra thrilling stimulation into your strap-on play, for both the wearer and the receiver. The shafts are generally thick and firm and vibrate powerfully, and there are plenty of colours, sizes and modes to choose from.

Key features and benefits of strap-on vibrators:

  • All the same features of a strap-on dildo
  • Enjoy pleasurable rumbling and buzzing vibrations through your whole body
  • These can be extra fun for pegging, as they provide stimulation for the wearer as well

Intrigued? Check out our complete collection of buzzing strap-on vibrators.

Want us to decide for you? The purple Soft Touch Silicone Rechargeable Vibrating Strap-On is our favourite in this category (see picture).

Most popular strap-on gear – Strap-on Harnesses

Adjustable strap-on harnesses are perfect for combining a harness with your favourite dildo. These harnesses are typically compatible with any dildo that features a flared base, suction cup, or testicles. Make sure the harness fits you properly so that you can wear it comfortably during penetration. The harnesses feature many colours, styles and designs. Once you’ve found something you like, check that the O-ring on the harness will fit the dildo’s diameter.

Browse our full range of comfortable strap-on harnesses and find the right fit for you.

Need help finding a good all-rounder harness? Consider the ToyJoy’s Get Real Strap-On Harness (see picture).

Most popular strap-on gear – Strap-on Sets

If you want to add strap-on play to your bedroom repertoire but aren’t really sure where to start, then a strap-on kit is your best bet. The strap-on sets are fantastic for experimenting with your partner. They provide all you need – a harness and a compatible dildo. And then all you need to do is go wild. Switch roles, take control, and explore new sensations.

Key features and benefits of strap-on sets:

  • A fantastic option for strap-on sex novices – you don’t need to buy the harness and dildo separately
  • Buy with confidence – you won’t need to worry about finding a compatible set

Shop our full range of enticing strap-on sets and get ready to enjoy a whole new world of fun (and don’t forget the lube!).

A tricky decision, we understand. If you’d like us to decide for you, we recommend the Fetish Fantasy Series Beginners Strap-On For Him Dildo (see picture).

Most popular strap-on gear – Double Penetration Strap-Ons

Double strap-on either allow both partners to enjoy the penetration simultaneously or one partner to experience the blissfully full feeling of double penetration. These designs are typically held in place by harnesses or cock rings.

Key features and benefits of double penetration strap-ons:

  • New discoveries and sensations guaranteed!
  • The results from double strap-ons are incredibly stimulating and intense
  • These toys provide the most versatile options for enjoying strap-on play and dual satisfaction
  • Simultaneous vaginal and anal penetration

Can’t wait? Browse our full range of seductive double strap-ons and get going!

Or if you want to check out our top pick – consider the Plena II Double Penetration Strap-On (see picture).

Most popular strap-on gear – Strapless Strap-on

Strapless strap-ons are double strap-ons that do not require a harness to keep them in place. Instead, these strapless penetrators are held in place by the wearer’s pelvic floor muscles, with the other, typically longer end of the two shafts, used to pleasure and penetrate the receiving partner.

Key features and benefits of strapless strap-ons:

  • Simultaneous penetration and mutual pleasure that takes your orgasms to new heights
  • These are the only strap-ons that also provide G-spot stimulation to the wearer! This, together with the clit vibes from buzzing models, can serve truly mesmerising moments
  • Heightened intimacy and stronger connection to your partner during lovemaking
  • The toys typically feature good lengths and girths, mostly with firm vibrating shafts, which are equally great for vaginal and anal penetration
  • Can also be used in solo play if your playmate is not around, especially so for the vibrating versions

Have a browse through our full range of strapless strap-ons and see which one catches your eye.

Shall we pick for you? You’ll love the Vibrating Strapless Strap-On 2 Remote Double Teaser (see picture).

Most popular strap-on gear – Hollow Strap-on

Hollow strap-ons enhance your natural penis, ensuring you always have a strong, lasting erection. Simply place your package inside its hollow space. This strap-on allows you to pleasure your partner with extra length and girth – some models even have a vibrator embedded to really supercharge the experience.

Key features and benefits of hollow strap-ons:

  • A guaranteed hard and ever-lasting erection in almost any desired format and texture
  • Can be used whether you are flaccid or erect
  • Fun and super stimulating
  • Provide an easy and satisfying solution for couples struggling with erectile dysfunction, allowing you to continue enjoying exciting physical intimacy

Take a look at our range of hollow strap-ons and see what takes your fancy.

If you asked us, we’d recommend checking out the 6-inch Erection Assistant Hollow Vibrating Strap-On in flesh pink (see picture).

Most popular strap-on gear – Packers & Packing Underwear

Packers create the lifelike bulge under your clothes that you are after. Whether you opt for a natural bulge or want to display something truly extraordinary, packers allow you to enjoy the feeling of a penis comfortably situated in your underpants. Packing dildos convincingly imitate real penises, including a realistic head and testicles, while packing underwear perfectly holds your new friend in place.

Key features and benefits of packers and packing underwear:

  • Packers are soft and flexible so they can be bent, rotated and stretched as required, and are designed for extended wear and total comfort
  • Once settled in the underwear, the lifelike packers warm to your body temperature, which adds to the sensation of having a real penis
  • Packers fit effortlessly into most harnesses, close-fitting underwear and packing pouches for seamless gender-play or fulfilling gender expression
  • For transgender people, packers not only create an instant difference in physical appearance but can also help you to build confidence during transition

Check out our full range of packers and packing underwear.

A popular choice among our customers is the Lovetoy Skinlike Limpy 5-Inch Packing Cock in flesh pink (see picture).